Thursday 13 November 2008

The Good, The Bad and The Hairy

So, the Good Stuff and Bad Stuff from yesterday…

Good – ‘C’s Hair Day’ went down a storm. Everyone took part and C was touched that we’d created a day just for him. I’d attach photos, but would have to ask their permission which could lead to uncomfortable questions about blog addresses. You’ll just have to imagine the wondrous sight of 30 assorted IT analysts in small black and silver afro wigs.

Bad – We thought that The Cat had recovered from the trauma of the night before (see previous post). Big Al talked him down from the kitchen window (The Cat is a man’s man and treats me with the disdain I deserve) and comforted him with treats. All was calm. Until early this morning, when The Cat broke into our bedroom and sicked up several hairballs of black and silver afro wigs, over the duvet. Changing the sheets and scrubbing the carpet at 4 a.m. brought back many happy memories of The Little Prince’s early years.

Good – I looked hot yesterday. I wore an amazing pair of CHEAP jeans from New Look which took me from a size 16 to a size 12 and gave me super model legs.

Bad - said jeans turned out to be made from cheap stretch denim and grew bigger throughout the day. I had to hold them with both hands when walking and hitch them up every time I stopped. It reminded me of being 5 years old in the playground and pulling up baggy woollen tights. Not a great look in front of my team.

Good – Last night, I managed to fit in to the dress I brought last week for the impending Christmas party. I brought a size too small (WHY?) but after the three of us struggled for 10 minutes and after much shouting, swearing and sweating from all sides, we finally managed to do up the zip.

Bad – It looked rubbish. I’d had to hoist my industrial sized boobs to one side in order to get the dress done up, and it was so tight that I couldn’t move them back into position. The bright purple, which seemed funky and sexy in the shop, just looked ridiculous in our sitting-room. I looked like a lop-sided Quality Street.

Which reminds me, someone has brought in a tin of Celebrations. Now that I have no dress to slim for, I think I’ll tuck in. There’s always a silver lining.

6 comments:

Catherine said...

Hilarious! I have jeans like that, must bin them!

ADDY said...

Have just found your blog (cannot remember how I got here, but may have been via Dulwich Divorcee). Am with you on the tin of Celebrations. Enjoy!

Iota said...

I dunno. I think the purple quality street is most people's favourite. Maybe it's a look worth exploring further.

Footballers Knees said...

Hi all, thanks for your comments.

AM - yes, bin them, beauty means nothing when you're standing in public with your jeans fallen around your ankles.

Rosiero - am up to Number 11 on the Celebrations - I may develop a late peanut allergy from over dosing on mini Snickers.

iota - you are right, of course. The purple ones always go first. But I'm trying to go for a slimming look, and bows at either end add so much to the hips!

Paradise Lost In Translation said...

Ah, that wd probably explain my jeans then, I thought I'd just lost weight.....

Potty Mummy said...

Still struggling with your description of lopsided chests...