Wednesday, 24 December 2008

The Twelve Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: Nigella's Christmas on DVD.

On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: two diamond earrings and Nigella’s Christmas on DVD.

On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: three Touche Eclat pens, two diamond earrings and Nigella’s Christmas on DVD.

On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me: four Woolford stockings, three Touche Eclat pens, two diamond earrings and Nigella’s Christmas on DVD.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: five Singapore Slings (I could have said Tiffany rings but that would have been ridiculous)… four Woolford stockings, three Touche Eclat pens, two diamond earrings and Nigella's Christmas on DVD.

On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: six Hermes scarves swaying, five Singapore Slings! Four Woolford stockings; three Touche Eclat pens; two diamond earrings and Nigella's Christmas on DVD.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: seven bracelets jangling; six Hermes scarves swaying, five Singapore Slings! Four Woolford stockings; three Touche Eclat pens; two diamond earrings and Nigella's Christmas on DVD.

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me: eight Mulberry handbags (Don’t pull that face! I didn’t get the Tiffany rings); seven bracelets jangling; six Hermes scarves swaying, five Singapore Slings! Four Woolford stockings; three Touche Eclat pens; two diamond earrings and Nigella's Christmas on DVD.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: nine Tiffany charms (oh, what the hell); eight Mulberry handbags; seven bracelets jangling; six Hermes scarves swaying, five Singapore Slings! Four Woolford stockings; three Touche Eclat pens; two diamond earrings and Nigella's Christmas on DVD.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: ten days in Aspen; nine Tiffany charms; eight Mulberry handbags; seven bracelets jangling; six Hermes scarves swaying, five Singapore Slings! Four Woolford stockings; three Touche Eclat pens; two diamond earrings and Nigella's Christmas on DVD.

On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love have to me: eleven nights in Hawaii; ten days in Aspen; nine Tiffany charms; eight Mulberry handbags; seven bracelets jangling; six Hermes scarves swaying, five Singapore Slings! Four Woolford stockings; three Touche Eclat pens; two diamond earrings and Nigella's Christmas on DVD.

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: twelve days’ notice to vacate the premises and a letter from his solicitor advising me that my husband was divorcing me on the grounds of my unreasonable expectations and grasping approach to our marriage.

Merry Christmas, one and all!

Inspired by Julie, the wife of a friend at work, who has created a dish for each of the Twelve Days of Christmas. I'm hoping that she'll write a blog on which to post the photos of her very clever menus.

5 comments:

rosiero said...

Happy Christmas!

Potty Mummy said...

Gosh. I wondered why you and Big a didn't open your presents in front of us - now I know!

blogthatmama said...

And a Happy New Year! Blogthatmamax

Tara said...

Hey, I like the cut of your jib . . . oh no, hang on, there isn't a happy ending. It's a Sex and the City ending. Darn you Footballer's Knees.

DulwichDivorcee said...

Yes, that all sounds very familiar, especially the end ...hope you got a scarf at least xx